My future and let it be mine….

I am tired being told here and there… do this n tht…
Why cant I decide for myself?

M I tht reckless?? Throwing myself to the wild n dangerous life?
Or mayb I am jz hopeless...

I start seeing myself living a dull life.. pretending smthg tht I m not..
A gd daughter, a gd wife n a gd mum… merely gd isn’t enaf...
I want to be d BEST in evrythg
The best daughter, the best wife n d best mum…
How can I achieve if all I do is following wht people said?
Wht best for people might b worse for me…
I m being mold...
Puppet is merely puppet. Thy wont be human...

I want… no, I NEED my time... To figure out what I wanna do…
Why can’t I take my time?

I might be in the picture, but can’t be seen… for I am standing under people’s shadow...

Apple vs Orange

Different people, different personalities, different perspective. One is not better than the other just different.

Peoples are made to be different..
Like apple, sweet and crunchy.. While orange, sweet and sour..

Both have different taste but still yummy..

Lots of woman love to ask killer question“me n her, who’s more pretty?” or, “do u think I look like that?”
It’s simple question but be careful dude, watch ur word..

if:

“u r way prettier”, she might stare disbelieving at u..

but if:

“she’s prettier”, man, u’ll be dead meat…

so, here's d key: “u’re an apple, she’s an orange..but all I see is only my apple”, I can guarantee, every woman will be ecstatic!!
So, who said woman is so complicated??

Restless Mind

I m wondering, why some people can hurt u greatly when some jz uncapable of doing so?

Only by a word, d damage is beyond repair? Only by a single act, perhaps?

Jealousy, is it? Maybe.. Why?? Maybe I know...

Perhaps I should run away before it's infecting my relationship with others..

But, will that solve the problem?

I know what I should do, but d solution only bring other problem.. N I don't want tht..

All that I know now is, ignoring is d best way...

Yes, I might hurt n hurt n hurt again...

But it's better thn nothing at all, isn't it?

And all my life I has been ignored.. can I suffered it again? Will i survive again?

I am not needed.. I am not special anymore..

but all I know is, one day... I'll be.. to somebody..

Do you know how much I care?

Perhaps I look stone-cold..
Perhaps I never look serious enough..
Maybe that is why u never believe how much I care for you??
Do u know how hurt it is, when I know u’re needed somebody n tht person will never be me..
Do u know how hurt it is, when I know u’re in trouble but all I do is to watch over you from far..
Do you know how hurt it is, when I’ll be d last person who knew??
Do you know how hurt it is, when all I can do is worrying over u??
I m a human.. with a feeling..
I m a human.. with a concern..
n I do CARE about u..
Plz stop hurting urself..cz u're hurting me too..

lucky enough to walk in my shoe....

We all has a story to tell.. Different life.. Different shoes.. Sometimes, u'd been tired.. Thinking, what had happen in ur life.. What u should hv done, what to be avoid.. N u thought that u hv the meanest shoes, n no one will survive if they in ur shoes... but does it really??

U thought that people treat u bad..

U thought that nobody care about u..

But, don't u still survive? breathing?

Yes, my life ain't easy...

There always be bump in my journey..

Along the way,

I fell..

I shed tears..

I experienced heartbroken..

I felt uncertain..

I feel lonely..

And this is my shoe.. n I m grateful enaf..

U look around, survey.. Some has worsen shoes..

Some aren't lucky enaf to meet merely bump..

They might lost along the way..

Try to walk a mile in their shoes... Ask urself, will u survive?

Congak...

When I first move to a new school in Kuala Terengganu, a teacher was weird because I did very well in my Math exam.. She even thought I was cheating... I can't blame her totally though, because I always get punished for not remembering multiplication table.. Whenever she asked verbally, I failed.. So, she test me again, with a new test paper.. And, still I did splendidly... All the time of exam, she watched me... Since that, i always excused from any verbal quiz ^_^.. no more punishment...yay!!!

This is a bonus question..

7+6=?

Most of u will straight away answer 13..

But for me, d process of answering will be

7+6=(6+6)+1=13

It is d easiest example..

Try a different one,

8x7=?

[8x5]+8+8=56

I took more than a min to answer tht 1...

I wonder if u understand what I wrote? [scrathing my head].. Anyway, so here's d thing.. I m very bad in congak(mental calculating).. I did not notice that I am having that trouble until form 4... But by that time, there's no more trouble bcz of d miracle of calculator..hahaha..

Insya Allah... I will survive

Everytime you feel like you cannot go on

You feel so lost

That your so alone

All you is see is night

And darkness all around

You feel so helpless

You can’t see which way to go

Don’t despair and never loose hope

Cause Allah is always by your side

Insha Allah x3

Insya Allah you’ll find your way

Everytime you can make one more mistake

You feel you can’t repent

And that its way too late

Your’re so confused, wrong decisions you have made

Haunt your mind and your heart is full of shame

Don’t despair and never loose hope

Cause Allah is always by your side

Insha Allah x3

Insya Allah you’ll find your way

Insha Allah x3

Insya Allah you’ll find your way

Turn to Allah

He’s never far away

Put your trust in Him

Raise your hands and pray

OOO Ya Allah

Guide my steps don’t let me go astray

You’re the only one that showed me the way,

Showed me the way x2

Insha Allah x3

Insya Allah we’ll find the way

InsyaAllah by Maher Zain..

I m in deadly mood, yes I admit..

I drive fast n dangerous...If u stress ride wf me, jz imagine when I m alone??

I'd throw my money...for a pair sunglass tht i don't need..book tht won't be read..half-eaten cake..

Evrythg doesn't seem right..cakes burned..needles broken..plan ruined..

But, InsyaAllah... I will survive...

Me n my patient

It is really hard to have book fair here in Kuching... so, i won't miss any book fair..So, ths Sunday I went.
I bought 2 books thinking tht it is 70% off for the sign on the desk said so.. The next morning I notice, it was cut to 30% only...
I went there, asking for a redeem.. N the staff said "u r suppose to read the sticker first, it said 30%" with an annoying face..

Hello, what is wrong? is this how you communicate, treat your customer?
What the heck?? Perhaps this is one way for them to kill my patient.

So, here's d thing..

1-they blame the customer to move the books from different place..But nearly all books there has 30% sticker, and they arrange all the books as if 30% and 70% belongs together! In no definite order, 30% n 70% is mixed!!
I mean they rearrange the book so why not at the time they should put back the book to where they belong? N they are put in a desk written big : 70% for member, 60% for non member..

2-about the sticker, there not a single sign saying it, when I point "u should at least put a sign saying tht d price is according to sticker" n she said "it's a common sense!!" what the heck? come to think about it, if you have 2 different price, it's a normal ethic to pay the lowest one.. Especially it's a very old books.. At the same place, I can buy the latest book for 30% !! And, I know they just a bunch of lazy people who hate to do troublesome work..[sigh]

3-what I ask is simple, I don't mind paying for 30% , but all I ask is to be treated as a customer.. Why don't start with "I m sorry for this misunderstanding, miss....."
here, let me emphasize the magic word... SORRY...

Crushing apart

I wonder how it feel to be crush under a big stone.. Is it same as how I feel right now?? Though there's no heavy stone but how I suffocated.. how my heart crushed.. My heart felt heavier each moment as if all air in the world is still not enaf... I keep on breathing, hoping that the heartache will lessen but instead it's growing stronger.. Perhaps now every breath is necessity,no longer a joy.. Maybe my life became meaningless..

I prepared to be hurt..but never will I be prepare to be hurt this much.. No word can express the sadness, emptyness, loneliness that I feel..

Oh, how I didn't show d world how I feel, coz if I do, then it's the end of u and me.. I still clinging, hoping for u... n how I don't want to fall apart.. how I can't remove ur photo, our photo together.. cz it's d only thing that remind me of how wonderful life is..

I LOVE YOU...

but mere love is not enaf... if we are meant for each other, then destiny will bring us back together.. meanwhile, plz open up ur heart.. cz u'll never know what's there for u..